Recently I have let go of my Monday evening Chi Kung class. Although it has been deeply satisfying to spend some time with some long-term students doing some more individual work, I reached a point where I felt the class wasn’t going to take off, and wasn’t viable either financially or energetically.
I’ve also spent some time over the last week or so going through my website with the aim of simplifying the content. I’ve discovered that in order to simplify I need to be really clear about what my message or purpose is, and in order to do that I’ve had to spend some time actively reflecting on what I do and what my motivation is.
This is an ongoing process and just as my book “The Living Art of Chi Kung” was a flag in the sand and not the end of my learning about Chi Kung, so is the current version of my website, and the current structure of my working week. The impermanence and the changeable nature of my work patterns, understanding and feeling state remind me that we never arrive…
“A good traveller has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.” (Lao Tzu)
Do I consider the fact that my Monday evening class failed to ‘get bigger’ a failure? In truth, there was a moment where my ego was hurt that more people weren't drawn to my class. However, I experienced such a sense of relief when I chose to let go and accepted that it wasn’t working for me, that I knew I was back in flow with the Tao again, a little more harmony resumed.
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” (Lao Tzu)
We (humans) struggle with uncertainty, with not knowing and with the fact that everything changes, and yet this is one of the few certainties of life (the universe and everything..).
Many years ago, I did a vipassana retreat (10 days of silent meditation from 4am-9pm every day). The first 5 days were spend noticing the breath and the second 5 days were spent observing the evidence that everything changes (sitting still can bring on incredible pain in the body – spontaneously disappearing and then reappearing somewhere else, evidence of said change!)
And yet the compulsion to hold things still, to have them in a knowable shape, to have arrived rather than still be travelling is always there. We need to constantly remind ourselves that flow is healthy and that stagnation is not.
Having let go of my Monday evening class, I’ve had several new enquiries about my Friday class – something unblocked and the flow has resumed.